Valentine’s Day ideas for every type of love language
Love is a many-splendored thing, so they say—but it’s also wildly complex! As you’re likely aware, showing love means different things to different people. And not fully understanding how your partner expresses or likes to receive love can lead to major friction in a relationship. For example, diamonds may be some girls’ best friends, but other people find more meaning in their partner doing the vacuuming on a regular basis or spending time curled up on the couch watching bad TV together. It’s all a matter of preference, and plenty of ~feelings~.
This Valentine’s Day (or any day!), celebrate amore by sending your partner/parent/sibling/BFF/barista/dog-with-an-email-address an online card that speaks to love in the way that they experience and appreciate it. We’ve got some incredible, fun Valentine’s Day ideas, all vying for your affection! Keep reading, lover.
Table of Contents
What are the 5 love languages?
Three decades ago, relationship therapist Dr. Gary Chapman, Ph.D. changed the miscommunication game when he authored “The Five Love Languages,” a book that narrowed down the ways people express love in relationships into—you guessed it—five primary concepts.
According to Dr. Chapman, those primary love languages are:
– Words of affirmation
– Quality time
– Physical touch
– Acts of service
– Receiving gifts
We’ll get into what each of the love languages means in a second, and add a few of our own, too—just for kicks. If you’re not sure which of the love languages most applies to you and your partner, you can take this online quiz to figure it out.
Love Language: Words of Affirmation
What it’s about
Talk might be “cheap,” but if your Valentine’s love language is Words of Affirmation, the things you say are actually worth a lot. People who respond to this love language are most receptive to and appreciative of the spoken or written word, and the meaning behind it. They enjoy hearing about how much you love them and how much they mean to you, and being given verbal compliments. One such WoAer? Our very own design partner Derek Blasberg: “I’m such a sarcastic person that on Valentine’s Day I tell everyone in my life that I love them, and then have to follow it up with, ‘no really, I’m being serious.’”
Ways to show your love
This one’s pretty straightforward: just say it! Tell your Valentine that you love them and that they’re your favorite person. Write it in a letter or in a card so that they can keep your words with them and reread it. Leave sweet little notes around your apartment or write a sweet sentiment on the bathroom mirror in dry-erase marker. If you’re musical or poetic, you can write them a ditty or a cute couplet about how terrific they truly are. You know that One Direction song “You Don’t Know You’re Beautiful?” Definitely written for a Words of Affirmation person.
How to say “I love you” –
Tell your Valentine you love them with a card that says how you feel about them, right up front. Some of our favorite compliment-forward cards include these that say, “Love you beyond measure,” “You make me so happy,” and “You are sweeter than honey.”
If you’re a fan of writing love letters, this is the perfect opportunity to get out something extra heartfelt. Tell them you love them—but don’t stop there!—tell them why you love them. This type of card content will go far for a Words of Affirmation person.
Love Language: Quality time
What it’s about
Does your Valentine appreciate having your undivided attention or having plans with you on the calendar? Then there’s a good chance their love language is Quality Time. QT people enjoy making memories and feeling prioritized, even if those memories involve hanging out on the couch hate-watching “Emily in Paris.” The more time they spend with you, the more comfortable and fulfilled they are. You should never make a QT think they’re a backup—that would just be mean.
Ways to show your love
Quality Time love language ideas are fairly open to interpretation, because everyone has different interests. Some Quality Timers might like going for a long hike together, while others want to spend the whole afternoon in bed chatting. Depending on what they’re into, planning an at-home wine-and-cheese tasting could be a nice way to share an evening, or hanging out for a day and leaving your cell phone (i.e. a distraction from the two of you) at home. How about a cooking class, or just cooking together? No matter what you’re doing with your Quality Time Valentine, make sure you’re not rushing the occasion.
How to say “I love you”
Spend time picking a card that fits your Valentine’s interests and personality. If they’re a homebody who loves company, try this card. Do they look forward to watching reality TV with you? This is the design for them. If they love when you travel together, this card could be the winner.
Inside your card, mention how much you love being with your Valentine, and include some highlights from the last year. So what if the most exciting thing you did together was watch every single episode of “Love Island” UK? It counts.
Love Language: Physical touch
What it’s about
Is your Valentine a hugger? Do they kind of freak out a little when you aren’t holding their hand? Then there’s a good chance they fall under the Physical Touch love language. To Physical Touchers, feeling loved means being able to feel, literally. It’s not enough for you to say you love them—you must show it, physically. They want all the (welcomed!) hugs, kisses, and affectionate grazes they can get. Body language is everything, and personal space is not a concept they subscribe to. As Aretha Franklin and Cher both sang, “If you wanna know if he loves you so, it’s in his kiss.” Could they be Physical Touchers?
Ways to show your love
A Physical Toucher will be *touched* by your efforts to make them feel good, physically. Show them you care with a fancy at-home spa day massage with oils and the works, or take a dance class together that involves partner steps. Public displays of affection (PDA) go a long way for Physical Touchers, so hold their hand, walk around with your fingers sort of tucked in the back pocket of their jeans, touch their arm casually while you’re talking over dinner, or make like middle schoolers and play a cheeky game of footsy. Aw!
How to say “I love you”
Even if you can’t see—and touch—your Valentine in person, send them a card that speaks to physicality. If you need physical touch love language ideas, you can tell them how hot they are, delight them with a couple of slow dancing sloths, or straight up ask if they want to “cuttle.”
No, nothing you write in your card can *actually* compare to an IRL touch, but you can come close. Try referring to your Valentine as your “dance partner for life,” the “best hugger ever,” or the “tonsil hockey MVP”—depending on your relationship, of course! The compliments won’t go unappreciated.
Love Language: Cute animal videos
*Paperless Post exclusive*
What it’s about
If your Valentine has a penchant for blowing up your DMs with clips of kittens who think they’re bunnies, or sharing heartwarming stories about bumblebees who lost their wings but not their will to live (we’re not crying, you’re crying), there’s a very good chance their love language is Cute Animal Videos. You used to have to watch “America’s Funniest Home Videos” to catch the content that brings CAVers so much joy—but thanks to the internet, most people who fall under this love language feel more adored than ever before.
Ways to show your love
In addition to forwarding every cute animal video you see directly to your Valentine the second it first enters your orbit, you can also create a cute animal video with your own pets, visit a cat café, or volunteer at an animal shelter together. BTW, did you know you include the URL to any cute animal video in the world when you send your Valentine an online card via Paperless Post? It’s true, and you should consider it. Strongly.
How to say “I love you”
If they love cute animals, you’ll naturally want to send them a card featuring their favorite cuddly critter. Do cats in clothes make them weak? How about a pug on a pillow? Or maybe a friendly fawn is more their jam.
In your message, wax poetic about them while referencing their favorite cute animal video or meme — “Shall I compare thee to a baby river otter playing in the snow?” (And don’t forget to include a link to a new video you know they’ll appreciate.)
Love Language: Acts of service
What it’s about
For some people, actions speak louder than words (or physical touch, or gifts, or time). If this is the case for your Valentine, they may be into receiving Acts of Service. A person with this love language feels most cared for when someone does things for them. This might include household chores, thoughtful gestures, or really going out on a limb to do something you know will make them feel happy and loved. These gestures are especially meaningful when they’re things the recipient has been intending to do (and dreading) or pushing off for a while. YKWYA. Sometimes, helping someone lighten their load is everything.
Ways to show your love
Treat your Acts of Service loved one with a thoughtful gesture or action. Take the dog for a walk on a particularly yucky day so they can sleep in, put up those shelves you’ve been talking about hanging forever, make their favorite meal for dinner (and actually eat at the table!), or have their car professionally cleaned as a surprise. To an Act of Servicer, no good deed goes unnoticed.
How to say “I love you”
Send them a card that shows how much you appreciate having them in your life, whether it’s your mother who’s always there when you need her, your partner who always helps keep the house tidy, or your thoughtful, one-in-a-million best friend.
In your card, let your V-tine know how much you’ve appreciated the times they’ve picked up your slack or done something sweet for you, and tell them that you’re always here to do the same for them. Breakfast in bed, anyone?
Love Language: Knowing your coffee order by heart
*Paperless Post exclusive*
What it’s about
Does your Valentine get majorly buzzed when you surprise them with a to-go cup o’ joe tailored exactly to their liking? Or how about when they show up to brunch a few minutes late—life moves pretty slow when you haven’t had your caffeine—and there’s a steaming mug of java already waiting at their seat? If so, then you’ve likely got a Coffee Order Memorizer on your hands. From best friends to best grandparents, almost everyone can appreciate the time and effort it takes to learn a complex cream-to-bean ratio. Hey, ain’t love Grande?
Ways to show your love
This one’s all about the little things (unless you’re talking about what size coffee you should be ordering for them—in which case, the answer is Trenta). Whether it’s an oat milk cappuccino or iced maple latte, show your V-tine you love them by bringing them their favorite coffee order in bed, to work, to the dog park, or surprising them in a non-creepy way right in front of their coffee place before they’ve even made it inside. You can also get them a gift card to their neighborhood café, or create a little gift set filled with the ingredients to create their perfect brew right at home. If you’re crafty, why not create a framed cross-stitch of their order for them to hang up and treasure forever? Why not?
How to say “I love you”
Need a card for a coffee fanatic? We’ve got the cards they’re craving. Send this one to your sweetie, this one to your friend with opposite tastes, and this one to your grandmother who knows you can’t have a cup with a doughnut on the side.
Inside, write something cheeky referencing their coffee order like… “Being without you would make my life incomplete, like drinking a coconut milk caramel macchiato without the vanilla syrup.”
Love Language: Receiving gifts
What it’s about
When Madonna sang, “We are living in a material world,” she was (probably) referring specifically to people whose love language is Receiving Gifts. This love language isn’t a bad thing—Gift Receivers tend to appreciate thoughtful gifts with meaning behind them, rather than pricy presents. Though that’s not to say they wouldn’t be thrilled by something shiny, too. Sometimes, love is just sweeter when it’s wrapped up nicely with a bow on top.
Ways to show your love
Some people have a particularly hard time getting gifts for others. If that sounds like you, and you happen to be spending Valentine’s Day with a Gift Receiver, well… best of luck. The key to making a Gift Receiver feel loved is to listen to them every day, take notes, and keep your eyes peeled for thoughtful gifts. It might be finding a favorite childhood game on eBay or surprising them with the hot sauce they’ve been craving from the grocery store. Strapped for cash? There’s nothing more meaningful than a sweet homemade gift.
How to say “I love you”
Send our gift-loving Valentine a card that hints at their love of getting stuff, whether it’s a box of fancy mystery chocolates, a beauteous bouquet of flowers, or something a little more sparkly.
Since sending a Valentine’s Day card is already a thoughtful surprise that any Gift Receiver will surely appreciate, you can really write whatever you want inside this card. Try something simple, like “Having you in my life is the best gift of all,” or reference their favorite kind of present. If you want, you can even include the link to an online gift card—or better yet, the luxe Airbnb you rented for a surprise vacation 😉
Love Language: Showing up for the moments that matter, no matter what.
*Paperless Post exclusive*
What it’s about
For some people, being able to depend on someone else to show up for them at just the right moment is the key to feeling loved. From a five-year-old’s dance recital to a post-breakup brunch date to a surprise party they’re planning for their cat, it’s all about knowing how important it is to just be there. If this sounds like your Valentine, there’s a good possibility their love language is RSVPing Yes.
Ways to show your love
It’s pretty simple: don’t be a flake! The RSVPing Yes love language requires exactly what its name describes—saying you’ll be there when your Valentine needs you most, whatever the occasion—and then actually being there and giving them your best. So, want to show how much you love ‘em? Change out of your soft clothes and get a little social. Go to the party, the BBQ, the beach, the ski trip, the movie they’ve been dying to see. Even if there’s no formal invitation involved, pretend that there was. And if there is… then obviously, RSVP “yes” the moment you receive it. (Hint: Paperless Post invitations make that part easy-peasy.)
How to say “I love you”
Show your Valentine you’ll be there for them no matter what the situation. For a group of friends who always have more fun together, try this card. If you’re missing the one you can’t do without, this card is perfect. And if they’re truly missing the social scene, let them know you’ll be right there as soon as it heats back up again with this sweet card.
In your card, make it clear that you’ll always show up for your Valentine the next time they throw a party, need a plus-one, or just want someone to gossip with on the couch. If your friend has recently gone through heartache or loss, you can let them know that you’re there for them, anytime they need you. We love the message, “When the world sorts itself out, my first stop is you.”
Are you ready to show the love? Browse our entire collection of sweet Valentine’s Day cards, or you can plan a party with our Valentine’s party invitations.
